Target Mom

I met a mom at Target today. The first time I saw her she was putting her baby back in her stroller in the bathroom. Just having had her diaper changed, the babe was not happy about going back in her seat. My girls and I went in our stall and took care of business, G and I remarking on how it sounded like a tiny baby and how when E cries she sounds like a "big, big baby."

After washing our hands and exiting the bathroom I saw the mom again. This time sitting on a bench just inside the store's main entrance. Hidden from shoppers unless they themselves were answering the call of nature. She had her head tucked down, like she didn't want anyone to see her face. The baby was still crying, even though her mom had a bottle in hand ready and trying to feed her. We walked past to grab a cart, but never made it that far. Something about the mom made me want to sit. To help. To hold the baby and let her mommy cry. I've been there. I've SO been there. Maybe that's why I wanted to help so bad. Awkwardly, my girls and I sat next to her on the bench. All the while, I'm praying internally for Him to give me the words to say. "Let me be an encouragement. Let me help her. Being a mother is hard, help her know she's not alone. Please don't let this be weird."

I'm not even sure how I started a conversation with her. I think I just sat down next to her, put G between us and started talking to G about how cute and little the baby was. Eventually the mom and I started talking. I think I asked her how old the baby was, 7 weeks, and what her name was, Eliza. G and I then commented on how we knew another baby named Eliza, she's my cousin's baby.

I asked her if she was ok and she gave me the standard "oh ya, I'm fine" while hiding her face and wiping her tears. Why wouldn't she? I'm some strange lady who just sat down next to her and tried to start a conversation. She told me about how she used to work in daycare and how it was totally different now that it's her own. I told her I completely agreed, and that I also worked in daycare before having my children. I told her she was doing a good job and that it does get easier. She asked me what helped me and I told her about Mops and how it was nice to talk to women who had been where I was and were going through the same things. She said they had it at the church she used to go to but the one they attend now didn't have it because it was too small.

I found out her and her husband go to a foursquare church in the Mountlake Terrace area. We talked about our churches. We chatted about her husband, he's from Florida, and where she grew up, Monroe, where they lived now, and how she was trying to go to school online to get her degree. All while she was trying to feed and burp her sweet baby. I talked to Eliza about how cute she was, how she was supposed to be a happy girl for her mommy and take it easy on her while they were out and about. G sat and played Ant Smasher on my phone, E slept in her carseat next to me.

Eventually Eliza calmed down and ate and pooped. As we were parting ways, her to change a diaper, me to finish shopping, the mom thanked me for talking to her and told me it helped to talk to someone, even if it was a stranger. I told her she was welcome and that if she ever wanted to come to Mops where and when our group met. I told her she was doing a good job and to hang in there. I didn't even get her name but I've spent the rest of the day praying for her and her sweet Eliza. Praying it was enough, that I was able to lift her up, even if it was only a little. Praying that she finds a place to get connected with other moms, that she knows she's not alone. That her and her precious baby know they are loved, even if it is by some weird lady who just sat down and forced her to have a conversation with her.

Shalom

Grace turns four in two days. Her party is three days after that. I'm a little stressed. 50 people so far are coming with another 10-20 possible. Needless to say I've been a little stressed on how to feed that many people on a budget. Church on Sunday was about peace. There is no way I could dive into everything Pastor Jim covered here so I'm just going to encourage you to listen to it. It's good. You can find it here once it is uploaded to the website: http://itunes.apple.com/podcast/new-life-church-everett/id122166998

On the way home from church, I was again thinking about what to serve, how to get it there, how messy it will be, etc, etc. Steve got a verse a day flip calendar for Christmas and I've really enjoyed reading the topics everyday. After I got home I was just going about my day still kinda thinking and processing how and what to do when I realized I hadn't changed the day over.

Here is what it said:

"The wisdom that comes from God is first of all pure, then peaceful, gentle and easy to please" James 3:17

"The heart of Jesus was pure. The Savior was adored by thousands, yet content to live a simple life...Jesus' heart was peaceful. The disciples fretted over the need to feed thousands, but not Jesus. He thanked God for the problem. The disciples shouted for fear in the storm, but not Jesus. He slept through it. Peter drew his sword to fight the soldiers, but not Jesus. He lifted his hand to heal. His heart was at peace."

Something I didn't even realize until right now, Grace's story in Sunday School was about how Jesus fed thousands with one basket of bread and fish. Okay God, I'm getting it.

Thank you for continuing to reveal yourself to me. Thank you Jesus my child is so loved that over 50 people would want to come and celebrate her. Give me peace in planning and throwing her party. Thank you for the food we will eat, help me not to stress about having enough. Thank you for blessing us with people who love us in spite of our weaknesses.

I'm going to hang the pictures Gracie colored in class by the food as a reminder that God provides.

Confessions

1. I can't sleep with socks on.

2. When I load the silverware in the dishwasher, I put one piece in each spot and then circle around so all the spots have the same number of pieces in them.

3. I love washing and drying laundry but I hate folding and putting it away.

4. I freakishly enjoy scraping ice off the windows of my car. (Like, I would love to not park in the garage so that I have ice to scrape)

5. I can't wait to have grey hair and wrinkles.

6. I would love to be a surrogate someday.

7. I'm addicted to Fruit Ninja

8. I like to have the volume on even numbers. If it's on an odd number, I change it. 5's are ok because they can be easily divided. 7 is fine. If it's on 6 I change it to either 5 or 7. (only true for single digits, 16, 26, 36, etc are fine, 17, 27, 37, etc are not. 15, 25, 35 etc are still ok. Get it?)

9. I still love watching my wedding slideshow.

10. I am addicted to aprons. I have at least 5. (and I don't wear them that often)

11. When I light a candle, I burn both ends of the match because if I don't I feel like I'm wasting it.

12. I am so competitive at games I've had people say they won't play with me anymore.

13. I was not prepared for how constant being a mom is. There are no vacation or sick days. No "15's" or lunch breaks.

14. I hate that I yell at my children

15. I don't do well with lack of sleep.

16. I am not a nice person in the middle of the night.

17. I hate breastfeeding.

18. I have been diagnosed with Postpartum depression.

19. I feel so shamed by number 18.

20. I am lonely most of the time.

21. I have a deep desire to have close friends. The kind of friends that are so close they are like an extension of my family.

22. I love my sisters. They make me who I am. I don't have to say anything and they get it. They get me. They know my past (and my present for that matter) and they still love and accept me.

23. I really enjoy being involved with Mops at my church. I would love to be closer to a lot of the women there.

24. Most of the time I am ok with my body. Even if it is 70lbs heavier than when I was in high school.

25. I love having things that belonged to my family. My grandparents dining room table, my grammie's jewelry box from Japan, my grandpa's rocking chair, a bookshelf Steve's grandpa made. I feel closer to them just having these things in my home.

26. I want another baby but the thought of having a boy scares me after having two girls.

27. I love snuggling.

28. Someday I want a house with a big front porch and lots of parking so I can have people over.

29. My husband is a better cook than I am... and I'm ok with that.

30. I like watching football and by "watching football" I mean having it on the t.v. while I do other things and randomly check the score.

31. I love planning parties. Birthday parties, baby showers, bridal showers, you name it, I like it!

32. I can't wait to be a grandma someday.

33. I know Gods not done working in me.

Big Girl Bed

It's official!

Gracie is in a big girl bed! The transition was awesome. She LOVES her new bed!!!

I think she would let Ellie sleep with her every night if we would let them. :)

Blerg-ity Blerg blerg blerg

Ha! I just installed the blogger app on my phone thinking I should get back into posting and look what I find! An unpublished post from almost exactly two years ago! Wow how life has changed! Hopefully I'll give you a much more updated update soon for now, enjoy this old jem. :)

That's kinda how I feel lately. Not very much is going on but at the same time I feel like I haven't had time to just relax. Is that just life with two kids? Don't ask me, I really couldn't give you a straight answer at this point.

Okay! Enough about how blah I feel and onward to the info I know you are all DYING for. Ellie is now almost five months old. I can't believe how fast it has gone! I can't believe its been 5 months but at the same time I can't remember what life was like before she got here. Although I do remember that I was more rested... I'm up to two, sometimes three cups of coffee a day. Ouch. She used to be a good sleeper. She was going between 7 and 11 hours between feedings and now she's up every 2 1/2-4 hours. Reflux has been fun. Her medicine made her constipated, so we stopped giving that to her. The constipation seemed to bug her more than the reflux so I figure I can deal with lots of spit up and just do lots of the girls' laundry. Blerg. Ellie got her first tooth on the 6th of September. Wow. Way earlier than Gracie. She was like 9 months old when she got her first.

Grace is a silly and opinionated three year old. I don't think I will ever understand how someone can make me die laughing one second and make me want to pull my hair out the next. I can tell you one thing for sure, I'm glad she has her silly and goofy side otherwise I don't think we'd make it through the grouchy times. Steve and I are learning more about her everyday and trying to turn what we learn into ways to help her be a well rounded person. It is not easy, that's for sure!

I'm amazed at how different my girls are already. They do have quite a bit in common but they are their own person!!! Gracie was such an easy baby, slept though the night at less then 8 weeks, didn't spit up much at all, super easy going. She is however, a challenging preschooler. Ellie is a little more work. She still doesn't sleep though the night, she has reflux so she's constantly spitting up and she knows what she likes and wants and has no problem letting you know if it's not right. We'll she how is as she gets older. She is also very happy. It doesn't take much to get a smile or a laugh from her. Grace is the same way. I feel blessed to have such happy children in spite of all the rough parts.

Both of my girls have this really high pitched scream when they're upset. I literally have a physical reaction to it in my brain. I don't know how or why my mom had as many as she did. I'm overwhelmed with my two I can't imagine raising 7!

Ellie's Arrival

I'll try to leave out the most graphic of details for the squeamish but still try to give an accurate account of Ellie's arrival into the world. Here goes:

Ellie had been consistently measuring 2 weeks big for about a month. Then she measured four weeks big. We decided to induce. (I would rather induce labor then need a c-section cause she got stuck) We were scheduled to be at the hospital at 5:30am on April 13th (my 25th birthday). Gracie stayed the night with Auntie Kari so We wouldn't have to worry about getting her up and out the door that early. Steve and I got to the hospital on time and spent the first 25 minutes in the waiting room. Our nurse came and got us settled in room 327, our home for the next 2 and a half days. Dr Wong hadn't left orders for how he wanted to induce so we had to wait for him to come on shift at 7am. It didn't seem to take too long because they had to do my iv and such. Pitocin was started at about 9 and things got rolling.

Dr Wong checked me at about noon (when he had been hoping to break my water) and I was still only dilated to 2cm. He told me he'd be back in the evening and we'd probably be able to do it then. It started to look like we were in it for the long haul. From that point on my blood pressure was pretty high. At one point they had to stop allowing visitors in the room because the nurse was worried I would start having seizures if it didn't go down. Crazy scary. I decided I wanted the epidural before Dr Wong broke my water because my contractions were already getting intense and it would only get worse once my water broke. At about 6ish in the evening the epidural doc came in. She was planning on doing an epidural and a partial spinal block (in case I needed an emergency c-section it would be easier to already have the spinal) but my body wasn't appreciating the spinal. She couldn't get it placed without sending "zingers" up my back so we didn't do it. Oh well.

The 7pm nurse change was interesting. With Gracie all my nurses had been women and so far all my nurses had been women but at 7:00 in walks this 6 foot something 200ish pound man telling me he's my new nurse. Awk-ward! He introduced himself as Dave and said he knows he doesn't look like your typical labor and delivery nurse but that he had delivered over 2,000 (yes, 2,000!) babies. I decided we'd be ok. After all my doctor was a man so what's the big deal if my nurse was too? Steve and I actually really enjoyed having him as our nurse. For those of you that don't know me well you might not know that I am prone to high emotion (shocker) so having 3 men who are all very logical and matter of fact was refreshing, and might I add, very calming.

At about 1:15am on the 14th my epidural wore off and the anesthesiologist had to come back in to try and get it under control.

I must admit, from the very beginning of my pregnancy I had

said I either wanted to wait a little longer this time before getting

the epidural or that my body would move so quickly that there

wouldn't be time for one. I felt like I jumped to it quickly with

Gracie (though at the time I didn't think so) and wanted

to experience more of my labor un-medicated.

Little did I know I would get both.

Honestly, the contractions were painful but not as bad as I had envisioned them to be. My pain level only when up to "8" for whatever that's worth to any of you. Nothing like "the worst pain imaginable" people describe labor to be and for that reason I don't think the epidural had worn completely off. By 1:30 Dave had checked me and I was at 6cm. Are you kidding me!? Around 1:40 something Steve texted my mom letting her know where we were at cm-wise and after that things moved too quickly to keep anyone updated. They were trying everything to get the epidural to work. She was giving me big doses at a time to try and boost it to catch up to my body, they tried switching my positions to let gravity help. Nothing was working.Then they dropped the feet off my bed and sat my head as far up as it could go and it still didn't work. At that point she was thinking maybe the tube in my back had moved slightly so the medicine wasn't going right where it needed to be. so they laid me back down and had me roll on my side. As soon as she got the tape off my back the contractions stopped being painful and all I felt was crazy intense pressure. Dave checked me and said she was ready to come out. "She's right there. Don't move, I'm going to call Dr. Wong" It was 2am.

At that point the anesthesiologist said "Well, I'm gonna get out of here and let you have a baby" With that she was gone. Dr. Wong came in, got dressed in his "delivery suit" as I like to call it, (It included booties that went up to his knees, thank goodness!) they raised my bed, took off the foot of it and by 2:24am I was holding my 9 pound 1 ounce 20 inch long baby. At 2:25 she peed on me.

Because they had worked so hard to get my epidural working again I had to wait a long time for it to wear off after she was born. When I finally was ready to stand up Dave was having me take it really slowly. He kept saying "go slow, let your body adjust, you've been sitting a long time. I don't want you to fall and crack your head on the floor"

Here is where I am REALLY thankful for a male nurse.

After I had Gracie I hopped out of bed like it was no big deal so I was expecting to be able to do the same thing this time. Wrong. Like I said, Dave was having me take it really slowly and honestly I should have listened better instead of pushing myself, expecting the same thing from after Grace.

Mild inappropriate content-only because it involves me on the toilet.

So, I made it too the bathroom and onto the toilet ok, but after that things went downhill fast. Got myself cleaned up and Dave was getting me ready "slowly, when you feel ready, no rush" to go back to bed when I started getting dizzy. I told him I thought I needed to sit there for a minute and that I felt light headed. Luckily the nurse that gives the babies their baths had just gotten there. Dave had her stand by me for a second to make sure I didn't fall (Steve said by then I had turned white as a sheet) and he went to push the call button for another nurse. When the nurse at the desk answered, he asked for ammonia snaps and almost instantly two other nurses were in the bathroom with us. About 30 seconds later a nurse came in with the smelly salts and he made me sniff them...twice. Can I just say they burn!? I felt like once was enough and put up a small protest about having to do it again but ultimately I obeyed, I didn't want to pass out any more than he wanted me to pass out. Steve said the color started in my nose and spread to the rest of my face. After that Dave held one arm, a nurse held the other arm and another nurse all followed me back to the bed.

We went home Friday mid-morning and Steve had the next two weeks off. It was awesome!

I can't believe it's been almost 8 weeks since she was born. I can barely remember what life was like before we had two. A little quieter maybe,, less busy. I got more sleep for sure! Over all she's a really great baby. At night we go between 5 and 7 hours between feedings so I really can't complain too much. I know some people aren't that lucky.

Hopefully I'll be able to update the blog a bit more now that things are starting to settle down. Sorry for such a long post. Thanks for sticking with me through it!

Grandpa

I don't know if it's because I'm pregnant or if it's because there is a man that sits in front of me at church who looks like him, or what but lately I have been wanting to watch the slideshow from my grandpa's memorial. In our various moves we somehow misplaced the only copy we had. Luckily I have a techy husband who not only made the slideshow but was wise enough to save a copy of it on one of our many hard drives. After causally mentioning once or twice that I wanted to watch it, he lovingly burned me another copy and left me alone to watch and cry.

It's the type of video I like to watch every once in awhile, but not everyday due to the obvious emotional response it generates for me. Gracie on the other hand, finds a movie she likes and wants to watch it everyday for weeks at a time. She likes this "movie". I have since watched it about 4 times in the last week so I shouldn't have been surprised when "out of nowhere" I had an overwhelming desire to hug my grandpa. To the point that it brought me to tears. It has been just over four years since he passed away. He was almost 69. I miss him.

2010: A Year in Review

Where to even begin? I didn't write a Christmas letter this year, there was just to much to keep it to one page. Consider this my substitute. :)

What a crazy year this has been! Thinking back on it I am overwhelmed with everything that happened. From the very beginning 2010 wanted us to know it was gonna be one heck of a year. Makayla, my niece, spent the first few weeks of the year fighting for her life, literally. She had a deep bleed in her brain that nearly killed her. The first five weeks of the 2010 were filled with visits to Children's Hospital, to visit Makayla and to support my sister, Kari, who was spending nearly every hour of every day there. We are so thankful that Makayla not only survived, but that she is continuing to exceed the expectations of all the doctors and staff who were and still are involved in her care.

Also during the first five weeks of the year, Gracie turned 2! What a roller coaster that has been! Her personality has totally come out. Most days are really good, but Grace has her own opinions about how things should be done and she'll make sure to let you know if she thinks you aren't doing it the way she wants it done. My mother in law says she is 2 going on 20. She has Bartlow and Hoskins in her which makes for a very stubborn combo, and good lungs. If she chooses to, Grace can make a noise loud enough to make your ears bleed, or dogs whine in pain. Sometimes I feel like calling her "strong willed" is an understatement. Other times, you would think she was the easiest kid in the world to take care of! She has so much energy! Grace loves to sing, dance, color, paint, and "do stickers" among other things. Her imagination is so vivid, which is both a blessing and a curse. She will play dolls forever, but if she thinks there is a tiger, the Grinch or a dragon in her room, brace yourself. Mild panic ensues and Daddy has to "grr" at them before they will leave. She makes us laugh. Her sense of humor is so sweet. Most of the time what she's saying isn't meant to be funny but the conviction with which she says it makes it hard not to smile and laugh. Even when she is in trouble, the things she says makes just about everyone in the room hide their faces and snicker quietly. She brings such joy to my heart.

In December of last year we moved, then in the beginning of June we moved again. That was an interesting week. Steve and I were going to be heading to Atlanta for Foursquare, our church denomination's, Convention. Steve has worked the convention just about every year since he was 16. This was the first year since we'd been married that we were going just the two of us. Our flight was scheduled to leave at 7am Friday morning. The week before we left we found out we had to move. (A long story, I won't go into it now) We didn't find a place until the Tuesday before we were to leave and it would be ready until after we got back from Atlanta. We had to pack for 3 things. 1. Atlanta, 2. A few days at his parents house before and after Atlanta, and 3. to put everything we wouldn't need in storage. Talk about stress. Then, on Wednesday we found out that the father of one of Steve's close friends had passed away. The memorial was scheduled for Friday morning at 11am. We decided I would fly ahead and check into the hotel and such and Steve would stay for the memorial and fly standby on a flight later that night. In the end Steve made it to Atlanta and we had an amazing week catching up with old friends, making new ones and seeing the city. Their aquarium, A-MAZING!!! Not to mention that I got to go to the Hoskins' motherland! (World of Coke Museum) So much fun! We got home safe the following Friday and moved most of our stuff Saturday.

In July we took our annual "Bartlow Family" vacation to Leavenworth. We were supposed to stay for three days but after we spent the first night waking up every two hours to let Gracie puke, we decided to head home a day early. We did get in a few trips tubing down the river though, which is always my favorite part. In August we found out we were expecting another baby and in November we discovered she was a girl. She is due to join our family a week after my 25th birthday in April. I'm not sure what I'll be doing for my birthday yet, but I'm sure whatever I do I'll be waddling my way around ready to pop at any moment. If the new baby is anything like Gracie or I; or as Steve calls her, Kelsey Jr, he is going to need a lot of help. That is a lot of emotions for one man!

Speaking of Steve. With each year I grow continually more

amazed at the man God has given me in Steve. He is an

amazing provider and protector for our family. Where I lack,

he excels. He is the calm to my storm, the clean to my, not as clean,

the logic to my oversensitivity. He reminds me it is ok to say "No"

if I really don't want to do something and is more than ready to

stand up for me if I need it. He is everything that I hoped for in my husband.

He is smart, and strong. He can fix my computer and my kitchen sink.

Although sometimes I am tempted to,

I couldn't ask for a more amazing man than the one I have. I love him.

Anyway, that was the majority of our year in a nutshell. I'm sure I've forgotten something but that's all I could think of at the moment and I need to go wake up Gracie from her nap so she'll sleep tonight. I hope everyone had a good year and that 2011 is even better!

What Gracie says

After 2 cups of hot chocolate Steve asked Gracie if she was gonna be bouncing off the walls in a minute. She answered "yep" while looking around at the walls. She then walked into the living room and Steve asked her what she was doing. Her response? "I'm gonna jump on the walls!"

Steve was reminding Gracie she needed to be quiet at bed time and was telling her the consequences if she wasn't. He asked her what she was gonna be and she looked him square in the face and said "A horsey?" Hmmm.... Where does she get her sarcasm from?

Talking about Ellie: "Sometimes she is not a nice baby. Sometimes she's a cry baby."

Driving past a hair salon in Marysville there is a window with a strawberry painted on it. "Mom, that strawberry is wearing shoes. (very matter of factly) That's silly. Mom, that strawberry has hair. (again, very matter of fact) That's silly."

While she was disobeying, she told Steve "Well, God says obey. God says obey your moms and dads and Ellie's"

I've been talking to her about telling the truth lately so when ever she disobeys and Steve or I tells her she needs to obey she says back "We-ll, the truth is not obeying!"

Gracie snuck into our room during the night and the next morning Steve was asking her how she slept and why she came into our room. She told him she was scared in her room. He asked her why she was scared and she said "I don't know, I was just freaking out!"

Grace and the cousins were gonna play Simon Says. Rachel said "I"m Simon!" Gracie said "I"m Theodore!"

After my in laws were here for dinner: "Mom you did a good cooking when Grandma and Grandpa were here."

Noticing we only had two string cheeses left in the drawer "I thought we were gonna save them for Micah and Tyler"

What Gracie Says, Halloween Edition

Sitting at dinner Gracie was telling Steve about the Shark (Shrek) movie and how Donkey says "I'm a Logan (Ogre), AAAARRRRRRRGGGGGGG!!!!!!!" Steve: "You're a Logan?" Grace: "Ya a Logan."

Michael's craft store has their Halloween decorations out. One of the things they have is a witch statue. Gracie call her a "silly grandma" She was telling Steve there is a silly grandma at the "crap store"

What Gracie Says/Translation please?

"When I was a baby I was teeny and tiny"

Talking to Steve: "Can I have... whatever I want?"

"I'm Gracie, I'm two. Mommy says I'm two and a half."

Talking to her chicken nugget: "Get otta here!" (Said just like Grandma)

Missafella= Isabella (she has 2 friends named Isabella!)

Germote=remote

Camtoons=Cartoons

Cutie and the Beast= Beauty and the Beast "Daddy says it's Cutie and the Dude, he doesn't say Cutie and the Beast"

While I had my hands on my stomach feeling super nauseas: "Mommy got a baby in her tummy, I don't have a baby in my tummy. Just Mommy"

These she knows how to say correctly now but they were so cute and I wanted to record them before I forgot what they were:

beeeceeeteee= Christmas tree (Which is also what she called ANY Christmas lights she saw. It didn't have to be an actual tree.)

Yo-Yo's= The Wiggles

Bae=Baby

da ganch= the grinch

What Natalie Says

Picture taken at The Farm last October just after her 3rd birthday

Inspired by the mother of a friend's blog about what her 5 year old says, I am starting a "sub section" to my blog entitled, you guessed it, "What Natalie says" (at least this time, she's had some good ones lately and I've been dying to share) In case you don't know Natalie is my 3 year old niece.

So here goes:

While talking to her mom about her birthday list (her birthday is months away): "Mom, um for my birthday I want a real deer and a real sheep. You know, like pets."

After singing Jesus Loves the Little Children with Auntie Katy: "Jesus loves all the children and all the cheese"

Talking about age:

Her: "Na na (it's what she calls me) did you know that on my next birthday I'm gonna be 24? Ooops, I mean 4."

Me: "I did know that. Did you know that I'm 24?"

Her: "Ya. (she didn't) But Na na, did you know that someday I'm gonna be really old like Papa?"

Me: "You are?"

Her: "Ya, but first I am gonna be just kinda old like Grammie."

Me: "I bet she would love to hear you say that!"

Losing It With Kelsey

Recently there has been a new show on TV called "Losing It With Jillian" I have never seen the show but I imagine it involves that spunky, bossy, noisy Jillian from The Biggest Loser and is all about how she travels the country looking for families in need of something and how she yells and screams them into shape.

This is not like that show.

This show is about a young mother of a 2 year old and her everyday struggles to maintain her sanity, unsuccessfully, I might add.

Today's episode begins with said 2 year old touching her behind while she was pooping, thus spreading poop ALL over the toilet seat, her legs, that pesky hair that won't stay out of her face and consequently, her face.

Not cool.

She has done this before and had a stern talking too. But to no avail. Mother and child hop in the shower to wash off. Child screams and hits the mother when it is time to wash her hair because there is no wash cloth to cover her eyes, even though she hasn't used or needed one recently. The mother tells the child (who had hit her earlier in the morning as well) that she will be getting a time out and a swat with the spoon as soon as they are out of the shower and proceeds to wash they screaming child's hair anyway; remember, there's poop in it?

They get out of the shower and the mother instructs the child as to where she can find her clothes to get dressed. Apparently the shirt the mother picked out was not a good choice, even though she bought it for her daughter while she was away for the first time a few months ago.

Might I add it is a very cute shirt.

Bright pink with mermaids on it.

(It was bought at the aquarium)

The child starts to scream and cry about how she "doesn't like this shirt" and "I don't want to wear it!" The mother forces the shirt over the child's head, puts on her pants and takes the child to her room where she proceeds to scream and cry for the last 40 minutes. She wants her kitty and baby, see post: The A Team, but since she still has not calmed down the mother refuses to bring them in.

Will the child be sold? How long will it take the mother to curl into a ball and cry herself?

Stay tuned.

Not so Joker Feet

Although I would say it required more light scraping with a finger nail than actuall "rubbing", it worked quite well!

Now, Does anyone know any toe exercises? I would like to rid myself of the "sausage toes"

Joker Feet

I went on a MOPS Leadership retreat last weekend. One of the moms was telling us about a toenail painting technique one of her friends uses. The idea being that it doesn't matter how messy the skin around the nail is as long as the nail itself was covered. Then, when the paint is dry, take a warm shower and the polish on the skin will just rub off. I'm waiting for the polish to dry and the more I look at my toes the more they look like the joker just made out with my feet! I'm not even going to mention the fact that my toes also look like little sausages! (Maybe that's why the joker was kissing them?) Anyway, here are my "before" pics. I'm off to test the theory. Results soon.

The "A" Team

The "team" is a group of Gracie's favorite stuffed animals and dolls that MUST be in bed with her in order for her to sleep. The team started out as just Bear Doggie. Bear was given to her by her daddy the Christmas before she was born, and Doggie was a gift from a Grandma and Grandpa. Baby joined the team around Gracie's first birthday and Baby Claire shortly after. Baby Claire used to just be a sub in case we couldn't find Baby but more and more she is on the starting line up.

Steve and I went to Atlanta in May and during my trip to the Aquarium I picked up Whale. From the night we returned he has been a constant member of the team. A few nights ago Kitty joined the team and appears to be rapidly becoming a permanent team member as well.

Team photo(L to R): Whale, Baby Claire, Doggie, Bear, Kitty. Not pictured: Baby (she was forgotten at Grandma's while Mommy was out of town for the weekend and we have yet to get her back)

Gracie can barely hold them all when she comes into our room in the morning but somehow she manages to get them all in one trip.

I don't think this will last much longer and told Steve this morning that we may need to make some lay-offs. He said before I made any decisions I would have to check with the CEO.

What do you think her answer was?

Ice Caves Part 1

About a month ago we went to the ice caves. Gracie walked almost the whole way by herself. She did SO great! Here are some of the pictures from our hike.

Steve told her to smile and this is what she did.

More pics coming in a second post.

What's New: Moving, Songs and Family Things

Steve and I spent a week in Atlanta, Gracie free. If you've read my previous posts you knew that. What you may not have known is that in the month before we went to Atlanta we were desperately searching for a place to live. Long story short, the bank was kicking us out of the place we were renting. There was a hearing about two weeks before we left for Atlanta that said the bank could file with the sheriff to evict us. So if we didn't get out before we left we ran the risk of the sheriff showing up while we were gone and who knew what they would do with all our stuff.

The week before we left we were driving around with Steve's parents looking at places we had seen on Craig's List. We were starting to head home and we saw one last sign. With a sigh and a very un-energetic "fine" we drove by. Curb appeal=awesome! So we called, rent was $50 cheaper than the max limit we had set for ourselves, good. Landlord does all the yardwork, fantastic, and might I add the yard is beautiful! I get the joy of a lovely yard and beautiful flowers and I don't have to do anything! Who could ask for a better? The landlord lives in the unit next door.

And before you say anything about how awkward it is, know, it isn't.

Steve and I have never been the type to not get along with our landlords,

even if they hadn't all been our parents.

We don't party late into the night, and even when we do have parties

they aren't the crazy loud, drinking out of control kind.

We are more, family BBQ in the back yard, kind of party people.

We are quiet and respectful of those around us,

We have never trashed or plan to trash anywhere we live,

nor do we let Gracie go crazy all over the house.

Anyway, the place was awesome and we decided to take it. The only problem was that it wouldn't be available until after we got back. So we moved all of our stuff into storage and headed to the in-laws for a few days (mine, not Steve's).

On top of all of this, the father of a close friend of Steve's passed away unexpectedly and the memorial was scheduled for the Friday we were to leave. Our flight was scheduled to leave at 7am and the memorial started at 11am. It was very important for Steve to go so we planned to rebook our flight. A few phone calls later and we found out it would cost more than the original ticket cost to rebook both flights, not gonna happen. After much debate we decided I would fly ahead and check into the hotel and Steve would try to catch a later flight on standby. In the end all worked out and Steve and I both made it safely to Atlanta.

We came home late the following Friday night and moved most of our stuff the next day. We have been here for almost a month and we are greatly enjoying it. Gracie's room is big enough that all her toys fit in it and the room isn't crowded, leaving my living room free of toys. YEA!!! We are excited to be here for awhile and hopefully we will be able to stay until we are ready to buy our own house.

Onto other news, Gracie has been in big girl panties since we moved in and is doing well. We still have the occasional accident, even while I was typing this post I had to pause to clean out some poopy panties, but most days are accident free and we're getting better.

On another side note, can I just say how much I loath

cleaning out poopy panties? It's gross.

Steve says all my years of working daycare

have ruined me. Just because when on the

rare occasion some poop falls on the floor and

I don't pick it up with my bare hands, does not make me ruined!

Besides, if you took as many bodily fluid safety training

classes as I have you wouldn't touch it with your bare hands either!

Since we've been home Gracie has learned so much! She not only is talking way more but she learned some new songs as well. Grandma owns a "Miss Patty Cake" dvd and I guess it is all Gracie wanted to watch while we were gone. She know knows the "Jungle Jamba" and other Patty Cake favorites that I get to hear just about everyday. Gracie and I have been singing "I got the Joy, Joy, Joy, Joy down in my heart" and have now added another verse, only Gracie doesn't understand the words completely yet so she just sings "devil, devil, devil, devil, sit on a tack, OUCH! Sit on a tack, OUCH! (The real words are "And if the devil doesn't like it he can sit on a tack, OUCH!) She thinks the "sit on a tack, OUCH" is the best part.

Onto the "family things" portion of my title. My baby brother graduated from high school and at his graduation he was one of the speakers. He did SO awesome. His speech was all about self discovery and on the impact one person can make. Steve posted it on youtube if you want to check it out. Makayla is doing well. Her doctors have taken her off of the really harsh seizure med and that has helped her regain more of her muscle control and be WAY more smiley. She is continuing to improve and we are so excited to see what God is going to continue to do!

That's it for now I guess!

I'm a Big Kid Now

A few days ago I took my first airplane flight by myself. I rented my first car and checked into a hotel by myself. It is also the first time I've left Gracie for more than a day or two.

I feel like a grown up..... and it's weird.

So far, I'm ok. I'm excited to see her at the end of the week but I really liked being able to sleep in after I stayed up a little too late.

Steve and I were talking about how weird it is to be a parent but not have your kid with you. Besides the obvious "empty hand" feeling it's weird because you could have 1 kid you could have 19 but if your kids aren't with you nobody ever has to know they even exist. When you get married, you wear a ring. It tells the world "Back off! I belong with someone!" But when you don't have your kids with you, usually, there are no outward signs they are there. (Gracie has yet to hurt me bad enough to leave a permanent mark)

I'm enjoying my time in "Hotlanta" (now I KNOW why they call it that). With Steve and Mike taking on a more consultant like role this year, we actually get to hang out some. We have gotten to eat together, explore the city a bit. Steve and I went to the World of Coke Museum. It was pretty cool. We got our picture taken with the polar bear. He was so cute! They have a tasting room with their products from all over the world. I really liked the Kiwi Apple Fanta. It was delish! I forget where it was from though. Some of them were not so good. One of them tasted like horrible cough syrup. It was gross. Yesterday I got to go the the world's largest aquarium with Dawn Vail and the kids. We had so much fun! Danny was running all over going "Oh wow. Mom look at this!. That is so cool! Look at that!" I think we stayed under the giant tank watching all the sharks for about a half hour! The aquarium has 3 whale sharks. They were huge! We got to see beluga whales, seals, otters, penguins, all kinds of fish, alligators, shrimp. Lol. I kid you not, they had a shrimp tank and you could touch them if you wanted. I don't know about you, but I can just go to the supermarket and touch them whenever I want. I got to touch sting rays and a small shark! It was so cool! The sting rays were really soft, kinda like those super soft baby blankets, but they were wet. The shark felt rubbery. It was really fun.

I love the Vails. The kids are so polite and fun to be with and Dawn is just so sweet! She just chats with everyone and makes friends wherever she goes. I like them more every time I get to see them!

We'll see how I do in the next few days of being away from Gracie but for now, I'm keeping busy and having fun!

Mother's Day

This will be my third Mother's Day. Hopefully it won't take us 10 shots to get a good picture this year.

We didn't even take pictures. Oh well.